Zappa fanatics already own this and newish Zappa fans already have it on their "Wish List," so I'll direct this review to any Zappa newcomers, cork sniffers, or plain ole curious types.

Like most Zappa albums, this album is a mixture of some deadly serious & artsy genre-bending jazz/rock/fusion music and some silly and crude "humor music." To be honest, Zappa makes the listener really work as there are occasionally irritating moments on the record ("Sy Borg"), some VERY profane moments ("Keep It Greasy"), some catchy stuff ("Joe's Garage" and "Why Does it Hurt When I Pee") and some downright beautiful stuff ("Watermelon In Easter Hay").

I think Zappa fans fall into about four groups:

1) Fanatics who think every recorded moment is brilliant

2) Those who prefer the silliness and weird lyrical content, but aren't so big on the extended instrumental noodlings.

3) Those who prefer the extended instrumental noodlings, but aren't so big on the silliness and weird lyrical content.

4) The curious who buy a few albums, never quite find the hook, and loose enthusiasm.

Be advised that if you fall into group 2 or 3, Zappa is VERY DEMANDING. He makes very little effort to be approachable, has no qualms about indulging a melody or an idea and is sometimes intentionally grating and anti-aesthetic. This album is no exception. I think it starts off very well, has some of his best songs in "Joe's Garage," "Why Does it Hurt . . . ," "Packard Goose" and "Watermelon . . ." I also think it drags a bit in the middle and that some of the "humor" is almost too crude at times. I'm no prude at all; but . . . well . . . one has to be in a certain mood to revisit some of the more explicit moments.

Still, in summary, I think this is in the top handful of Zappa's Post-Mother's work. It's an incredibly ambitious work that rewards a dedicated listener with something new on each repeated listen. Though parts of it drag a little, it's still an amazing and very adventurous work.

Anyone who dare disparage this disc is obviously a communist, a reader of Ann Landers or perhaps just mentally deficient. Why do some folks "get it," while others are left scratching some unmentionable appendage? After a thorough examination of Joe's Garage, and through our exhaustive and comprehensive research into the field of adequacy and metaretrospective skills, I feel that this phenomena of duality can be summed up with but one word: Stupid. (Race, gender and sexual preference failed to characterize any results in this or any of the studies reported in this article, and consequently receives no further mention.)

Unfortunately, one of the essential features of ignorance is that the person so afflicted is incapable of knowing that he is in fact stupid. Moreover, to have such information would be a panacea for the offense.

I would like to make some simple points here, and these first points are noncontentious: In many areas in existence, prosperity and gratification depend on comprehension, sagacity, or postulation in knowing which rules to follow and which tactics to pursue. This is true not only for committing crimes, but also for many tasks in the social and intellectual domains, such as constructing a solid and logical argument, or designing a punctilious musical endeavor. Secondly, people contrast widely in the perception and strategies they apply in these areas, with irregular levels of prosperity. Some of the information and conjecture that people apply to their behaviors are reasonable and meet with advantageous results. Others, for example the `I love The Backstreet Boys' hypothesis put forward by many adolescent girls, are imperfect at best and stupid or petulant at worst.

Perhaps more debatable is this point, when we argue that when people are stupid in the tactics they adopt to achieve success and satisfaction, they suffer a twofold impediment: Not only do they reach inaccurate conclusions and make inept choices, but their stupidity robs them of the capacity to recognize that they are stupid. Instead they are left with the mistaken impression that they are proceeding correctly. As Charles Darwin judiciously noted over a century ago, "Ignorance more frequently begets confidence than does knowledge".

At first, the reader may point to a "contrary-evolutionary effect" as an alternative explanation of our results. This theory is propounded by some scientists that believe human evolution is now working in reverse, as demonstrated by the current popularity of low-fat mayonnaise, the electric facial-exerciser and television shows like "Survivor." Although this fact appears obvious, stupidity is not invariably correlated with actual statistics or success rates. The abnormal endurance of WWF wrestling and the fact that some of the population vote republican demonstrates this effect. Face it, there is nothing more dangerous than a stupid person who thinks he is smart. Eat more Zappa.

I have been a Zappa fan since I snuck a listen to Apostrophe/Over-nite Sensation from my Dad's collection 20 years ago. Like much of Zappa's music, this album, perhaps his finest overall work, can be oversimplified and categorized ascetically (as a previous reviewer attempted to do).

This is not just "silly and crude humor music" and it does not fall into a "1,2,3,4 category" of Zappa listener. Joe's Garage, as a complete work, attacks and obliterates those individuals/organizations who, through various means of censorship, insidiously undermine the purpose of creating music.

He accomplishes this with direct attacks on the political right (e.g. the Central Scrutinizer), conservative religious parties (e.g. Catholic Girls), the media and all other pseudo-intellectuals (e.g. packed goose), and, really, anyone whose sensibilities would lead them to censorship of creativity. Consider the historical context here: the attack on music throughout the 1980's/Tipper Gore's The Parents Music Resource Center was founded in 1985. The content of Joe's Garage is intended to offend all these people.

Like all art, one can make a judgment of whether the overall piece appeals to their ascetics, which Joe's Garage does for me - definitely five stars, and leave it at that. However, true analysis of real art should leave one with questions on intent, message, and composition which Joe's Garage also does very effectively.

Through this analysis, one can realize one object of Frank Zappa's argument: freedom of expression (in this case music) is important and socially relevant; hence the aforementioned party's desire for censorship. Beautiful use of irony through music Frank!

"Eventually it was discovered that God did not want us to be all the same. This was bad news for the Governments of the World... Mankind must be made more uniformly if THE FUTURE was going to work out... It was about this time that someone came up with the idea of TOTAL CRIMINALIZATION, based on the principle that if we were ALL crooks we could at least be uniform to some degree in the eyes of the law. Shrewdly our legislators calculated that most people were too lazy to perform a REAL CRIME. So new laws were manufactured making it possible for anyone to violate them at any time of the day or night... which is one of the reasons why music was eventually made ILLEGAL."
--Frank Zappa, liner notes from Joe's Garage, Acts 2

This is Zappa's best album, and it may be the best album ever made! It is sort of a rock opera that takes you through the story of Joe and his run in with the Central Scrutinizer who "enforces all the laws that haven't been passed yet" including the outlawing of music. The album starts out in pop mode, with a simply great tune: Joe's Garage. Then Zappa gets preogressively more satirical, sexually explicit and bizarre with such songs as Catholic Girls, Crew Slut, and Stick It Out, fantastic songs all and quintessential Zappa.

The album's climax is Watermelon in Easter Hay which is a truly beautiful song. Instead of a rocking guitar solo, this is a slower, melodic, dreamy guitar "sonata" that is simply a must have for Zappa fans. Don't get me wrong, Zappa jams on many of the songs here, and those who like e.g. Muffin Man or Black Napkins or Ship Ahoy will love this album. But part of what made Zappa so great was his ability to do more with his guitar than just the typical rock and roll guitar solo. Watermelon in Easter Hay shows us all how much more the guitar is capable of as an instrument.

If you are new to Zappa, this is the album to start with. If you are a Zappa fan, you should own this already!

...to help finance his early 80s orchestra projects with RnR 3 record sets he did not really believe in? Unless it was to beat Warner Brothers at realeasing as many Zappa albums as possible within a year?... (Between '79 and '81, inclusively, FZ released himself 12 single LPs and 1 original single 45 RPM... You count 'em!) Or both?... Who knows what he really had in mind when he got around to releasing the second set (double album) of material as the follow-up to "Joe's Garage, Act I", back in '79. When we get to Acts II and III, what had started out on the first LP as a reasonably coherent premise now has turned into a hodgepodge that goes nowhere and everywhere, the backbone of which being seemingly his live, "xenochronized" (see other reviews here for explanation) guitar solos. Zappa could be, and was often, an extremely funny and scathing man, but he had no knack for story-telling... well not the kind of story-telling knack you need to fill 6 LP sides of a concept album anyway. When he runs out of steam for a development, then his Joe protagonist suddenly "dreams up an imaginary guitar solo" and... voila: another 8 minute "song" has seen the light of day! (...and straight from the producer's archives of live recorded material!)

There is some good music to be found in there. There is also some really bad music! Childish lavatory humour set-up to one of the most irritatingly hackneyed AOR chord progressions of all times ("Why Does it Hurt When I Pee?"), insincere, mechanical, boring blues-pop ditty ("Crew Slut") and, to top everything up, several minutes of a pointless, non-sensical party reggae freak-out sort of... just forget it!! ("A Little Green Rosetta", the closing track)

The "Sheik Yerbouti" double vinyl (from approx. the same era) was an aurally stimulating, wildly edited and generally funny mix-and-match collection of mostly very good material, and the band that performed it was involved, tight, spiritful and passionate. I don't really care for xenochrony: to me, it's like a fancy gimmick. I dislike "Joe's Garage"'s conceptual pretentiousness, almost complete lack of direction and, between every track, the boring interruptions by the Central Scrutinizer's voice (Zappa's), that force-fits everything from random live guitar solos to hitherto unreleased, irrelevant songs (some dating as far back as 1971) into the contrived storyline of this "rock opera".

If that's conceptual continuity, I don't believe in it. Music is (the) best!