I wrote a rhyme for K-Fed
That was an instant hit
So now to even up the score
I must do one for Brit

I'm sorry that her life's a mess
I'd help her if I could
But I'm happy to report to you
That this album is GOOD!

I've danced around to "Gimme More"
And laughed aloud with glee
To see her dish about it all
On track two, "Piece of Me"

I sped over to to "Radar"
The beat is really nice
So far this album really rocks
And may just "Break the Ice"

A slower track is number five
It's almost `80s pop
But when she sings "Get Naked"
I said, "We've seen it - STOP!"

She shares songwriting credits
On tracks seven and ten
Sounds like Missy on track eight
Then starts to rock again

Not all the tracks are perfect tens
But still there's quite enough
To prove that Britney can bounce back
If she keeps hanging tough

Rated: 4.5 stars





Amanda Richards, October 31, 2007

Don't call it a comeback. Call it a cash-in. Call it expected. Call it absurd. Just don't call it a comeback. When Britney first arrived on the scene nearly a decade ago, she had two main audiences: the prepubescent girl and the creepy old guy. But now Britney's much too raunchy for the younger audience and she's already given the old guys more than a glimpse of pretty much everything imaginable. Those who were fans have largely grown up or grown out of her. So you have to ask yourself, why does this album even exist? "Blackout" is the kind of album that exists for two purposes; to line the wallets of record executives and to boost the ego of Ms. Spears. The point of this album is not to give fans of Britney some new material, but to capitalize on the recent explosion of Britney in the tabloids and celebrity news media. Anyone who can't see that is probably the type of person that would buy this garbage.

"It's Britney, B****!" That's how she chooses to start the album, and my immediate response is, "I wish it wasn't." "Gimme More" has been a pretty big success for Britney, getting her the highest on the charts that she's been since "Hit Me Baby, One More Time" believe it or not. For what it's worth, it is the strongest song on "Blackout" and probably the only one that should actually exist. The production here is great, as it is through most of the album. Unfortunately for Britney, however, is the fact that the coolest part of the song are the pitch-shifted "mores" that follow her redundant "Gimme gimme gimme gimme gimmes."

Despite the production being through the roof, it's also the album's biggest flaw. Britney's voice (which has never been her strong point) doesn't even sound like itself half the time. Every trick that you could possibly come up with to disguise the fact that Britney can't carry a tune is employed here in the hopes that we won't actually notice. According to one critic, "In terms of studio trickery, Paris Hilton's album was practically 'unplugged' compared to this." Never is this more evident than on the song "Radar" where Britney sounds more like a robot than a human being. It's absolutely ridiculous!

Also ridiculous is Britney's insistence that she's still America's sweet, little seductress rather than America's punchline. She spends the majority of the album trying to sound sexy and convince us that she's so with such lines as: "If I get on top, you're gonna lose your mind," "Coming back looking delicious, yes I know they wanna kiss me," "I'm just a girl with the ability to drive a man crazy, Make him call me "mama," make him my new baby" "I can feel you on my lips, I can feel you deep inside," or my personal favorite, "Baby I'm just hot for taking, don't you wanna see my body naked?" (Chances are, he probably already has Brit Brit). All this stuff might have been sexy 4 or 5 years ago, but after seeing Britney in every bad scenario possible, these lyrics are a joke! Every time I start to think that she sounds sexy, I have an image of a coked-out bald woman beating the hell out of a car with an umbrella, or a mentally unstable girl who can't keep her kids in her custody for more than a few hours and whose idea of a comeback is casually walking around on a stage lip-syncing in underwear on national television. Granted, Britney doesn't do much on this album besides provide vocals (she's only credited on two songs for co-writing), but you'd think someone who's been in the business as long as she has would have the good sense to know that the majority of the lyrics on "Blackout" are laughable. At one point, Britney's singing "I fall off the edge of my mind..." over and over again. What the hell does this even mean? Does anyone know?

In the end, "Blackout" is a misguided, rushed, and ultimately botched attempt at a comeback from an artist that desperately need to take her time making an album that wouldn't be added to her growing list of bad decisions. After all her time in the spotlight, what I wanted to hear most from Britney was something real, something personal that goes deeper than the stupid and overused "bump 'n' grind" lyrics that fill this album. "Blackout" just screams of a rushed job and in the ends, it fails as anything other than a mindless collection of songs with maybe one or two songs that you could dance to in a club. The production is incredible, and if they ever release an instrumental version of "Blackout," I might recommend it to someone. But as it stands, "Blackout" is nothing more than a blip on my radar that I'll forget about tomorrow. And for those who may think I've devoted too much time dwelling on Britney's personal life, take a moment to realize that this album exists for the sole pupose on capitalizing on her escapades, and maybe you'll be able to forgive me. If the RIAA wonders why people download music illegally these days, look no further than this album. The American public is smart, and we know what good music sounds like. This ain't it! "Blackout" is a collection of mediocre songs, shoveled onto a CD in the hopes of making a quick buck on the tabloid adventures of Britney Spears. No more, no less.

Recommended for the mindless, and anyone who wants to give Britney the resources needed to continue her depraved lifestyle.

Key Tracks:
1. "Gimme More"
2. "Hot as Ice"



3 out of 10 Stars

While it is clear that Britney herself was only a small portion of the making of this CD, the beats, lyrics, and general tone are just what I'd expect from a Britney album - fun, light, and very catchy.

You can hear that Britney's voice has been played with in the studio - it sounds like she came in, did a bit of singing, and left them to perfect the sound. But even with that, the album is a lot of fun to listen to and one that I have been enjoying a lot. I love dance beats and songs that make me want to sing along and move, and this CD is great on both of those.

The best song is easily Gimme More, but the rest are all pretty good as well. Not a whole lot of character, but the songs are all catchy and there aren't any real losers in the bunch, which is more than I can say about most CDs I have bought!

If you are a Britney fan, go ahead and get this latest from her - it isn't as good as B in the Mix or her other top CDs, but it will stick to your player for a good long time!

Two months later: I wanted to add that this CD really has staying power. Most of the songs have really grown on me, and I have found that when I want to listen to something catchy and dancy, which is most days, I reach for this CD over other ones - even mix CD's of my own making! There is only one song I consistently skip past (track six) and the rest are pretty darn good. I have gotten most of the songs on the CD stuck in my head over the past months, and listened to it over sixty times, and I am still not tired of it. So overall I'd say this is a no-brainer purchase for those who like a fun dance beat.

Unfortunately for the current future of mankind, we humans (and particularly, we Americans) find ourselves in a particularly regressive state. We would rather watch a plethora of reality shows than CNN, we want superficial movies with talentless-to-only-somewhat-talented actors and actresses, we seem to find it perfectly acceptable that athletes and glossy Hollywood types get paid millions per year while teachers and scientists are often struggling to get by, and we mindlessly accept pretty-packaged musical atrocities as art. Whomever first described the musical fare in the vein of Britney Spears as "sugary" was absolutely correct. To the passive listener, Britney's music tastes good going down, but is ultimately not only of no value to the body, it is actually harmful.

From her first album until now, Britney has been the poster child for all the popular music cash cows that the greedy record executives anxiously sign to their labels. The philosophy is simple: make as much money possible by any means necessary. To do this, songwriters and producers are brought in to provide serious support to the usually barely-talented (if at all) "artist". The most financially-rewarding demographic has demonstrated in their buying habits that they don't want lyrics that make them have to think, they like sexual content (whether explicit or implicit), and they like catchy melodies and harmonies. Thus, the artist doesn't need to have even decent vocal ability. What is commonly referred to as "auto-tune" will make sure no off-puttingly wrong notes are hit, songwriters will write tepid lyrics (usually representative of immature modes of thinking), and producers will create the vocal melodies and accompaniment (or what is simply referred to as "beats" in the popular culture) that are easy to remember (and, oftentimes, easy to dance to). All of this serves to hook the *passive* listener on the music, which can result in any combination of album, ticket, perfume/cologne, toy, and clothing line sales.

Most music reviewers are proving that they really have no authority to be ranking albums, as they seem to be unable to tell just how terrible Britney's music is. I have already seen some far too optimistic reviews given to this album by critics, while the few truly artistically-impressive albums coming out are getting reviews that are just blatantly insulting when compared to those of "artists" like Britney. What seems to be impressing the critics is the production on the album. Sadly, the production is often credited to the performer when it should really be credited to the producers. Britney has certainly acquired an astonishing amount of money by now, and she brought in "it" producers who be able to carry her album for her. However, despite the constant criticism of her terrible vocal abilities (and probably terrible aural skills, although we can't be sure of that, since she continues to lip synch in her performances), Britney has demonstrated her infamous ignorance yet again and has STILL hasn't pursued serious vocal training to improve the quality of her singing. On top of that, her lyrics are still terribly lacking in creativity, uninspiring, and simply immature (and sadly, she had to pay people to write them for her because hers would be even worse).

Based on the other new releases for this week that I have seen, as well as the ridiculous amount of news coverage this album is getting (due to Britney's other parts of her life that she is also insanely ineffective at managing), I expect this album to debut at #1 on the Billboard album sales chart next week. However, that doesn't mean that my message will have been for nothing if I can convince even one person who is thinking about buying this album from doing so. We human beings are supposed to be progressive thinkers, as we are the most cognitively-advanced creatures on this planet. Music is art, and we deserve better than this as our art. We deserve for high-quality music to once again be the "popular music" of our culture. We have the power to decide what the record labels feed us, and one way to do that is to refuse to give them our money when they try to feed us this "sugary" music. We have to regain control.

Few will want to admit it, and even fewer actually will, but Britney Spears' "Blackout" is a scintillating, effervescent slice of post-millenium pop that will be a guilty pleasure for many in the coming months. Say what you will about the circumstances of Spears' personal life, which have certainly exceeded the threshold of outlandish, but those circumstances have no effect on her splashy radio and club-ready formula. Troubles or not, her music remains as sweet and caloric as candy corn, appealing to the hyperactive kid in all pop listeners.

Of course, Spears is not exactly a "force" to be reckoned with in the music industry in terms of legendary musical talent - Tony Bennett or Celine Dion she will never be. This is also not music for thinking people, but then with song titles like "Hot As Ice" and "Ooh Ooh Baby" that is more than implied. However, these facts alone do not invalidate Spears. The star quality that has endeared her to listeners time and time again is strong as ever on "Blackout" - one listen and it's hard to imagine these songs being performed by anyone else. Fitting her racy image to a T and never failing to deliver catchy, breathy pop hooks, they are as devilish as they are listenable.

On the biographical side of things, "Piece of Me" is a cheeky smorgasbord of self-referential (or self-aggrandizing, depending on how you look it) anecdotes smothered in chunky electro beats, while the Pharrell Williams-penned "Why Should I Be Sad?" provides an appropriate closer to a collection of songs otherwise grounded in levity with its bittersweet, resilient attitude set against the by now predictable (though nonetheless enjoyable) production work of the Neptunes.

"Gimme More," the set's lead single and Spears' highest chart feat on the Billboard Hot 100 since 1999, is one of the less notable tracks here compared to the trippy, atypical wordplay that marks "Radar" and the downright infectious "Get Naked (I Got a Plan)," a surefire highlight. Hi-NRG beats pulse throughout selections such as the dancefloor-ready "Heaven On Earth" and "Toy Soldier," which has enough kitschy fun for a cult 80's flick.

Throughout the collection Spears is the ultimate seductress, oozing genuine sex appeal and passion. By the time she coos "you make me feel so hot" throughout the lush "Perfect Lover," the second to last track, it's impossible to doubt her. May she now be a bona fide pop siren in the same league as Kylie Minogue? Possibly.

Jailhouse visits and custody hearings aside, Spears gives listeners reason for hope with "Blackout," easily her best and definitely her most intriguing outing to date, even when factoring in her 2004 hits compilation. Oddly enough, she has never sounded more comfortable in her own skin, making this album feel like a debut. Gone are the artistic pretensions that marred her last two albums (she is a performer, not a songwriter), and her material has taken a major upgrade in class. This music is able to self-sustain without the aid of shock value or infamous MTV kissing scene stunts because in and of itself it is purely entertaining.

All she needs is for her image to correspond and she will have her life as well as her career back on track.